Fuzz on my dirty jeans.
Flashes of sunlight through the trees.
Leaves travelling with the wind.
Yes, this is Wednesday.
The train's horn blares in the early morning.
The birds chirp chirp chirp outside my open window.
The sunlight floods in with morning's arrival.
Yes, this is Wednesday.
I awaken.
No one is there to greet me--
Usual, I thought.
Yes, this is woeful.
I burn breakfast.
It was cereal.
How can that happen?
Yes, this is woeful.
I leave the house.
The world lay before me
and all around me.
Yes, it is woeful.
Life is woeful.
Today is Wednesday.
My life today is woeful.
Yes, this is woeful Wednesday.
3.11.2009
Thoughts on Girl
Make bad.
This is how to tease a girl. This is how to tease a girl you really like.
This is how you play hard-to-get.
If you're sick of Orwell, work with Girl.
Don't eat oranges at rock concerts.
This is how to floss.
Take lots of boys.
Or else you'll wind up like Chuck.
I'm here to screw the world.
This is how to tease a girl. This is how to tease a girl you really like.
This is how you play hard-to-get.
If you're sick of Orwell, work with Girl.
Don't eat oranges at rock concerts.
This is how to floss.
Take lots of boys.
Or else you'll wind up like Chuck.
I'm here to screw the world.
Just Because
My smile fades. I have been disappointed. I asked the dog, "Why can't I see Bobby? You know I miss him and haven't seen him for a while. Why can't I see Bobby?" The dog replied "Just Because." Disgusted, I walked away from the dog.The next day, my newly placed smile faded. I had been disappointed. I turned to the dog an asked, "Why can't I see Everett? You know I as excited to go and see him. Why can't I see Everett?" The dog looked at me, and matter-of-factly said, "Just because."Disappointed, disgusted, dismayed, I walked away from the dog, seeking something better from what the dog could offer me.
Weight
[As told by he about she, as she lie next to he.]
Morning is almost here and I have barely gotten any sleep. She was distracting me all night. Not that she meant to keep me awake, she has her ways. It's not like she was tossing and turning or snoring or something like that; in fact, on the contrary: she was sleeping, angelic-like.
----
She slipped under the covers and cuddled close to me, trying to keep warm. She rested her tired head on my shoulder and looked up at me.
"You have dreamy eyes." She smiled. The phrase just seemed to slip off her tongue. The longer she laid by my side, the more relaxed she became. I could feel her muscles loosening as she leaned in hard against my body. I also felt her breathing change as she relaxed and trusted me. Every so often, she would inhale deeply and slowly, and exhale just as deeply and slowly. Her breath, as she exhaled, tickled my neck.
As she lie there, she was completely unaware of her strong influence on me. I felt her weight upon my body. It was like having the weight of the whole world upon my heart.A thousand questions raced through my mind.
"How was I going to support her? What can I do to support her? What kind of support does she need? Am I good enough for her? Why does she trust me so much? What's our future gonna be like? How can I make her happy?"---she adjusted her head slightly, subconsciously, which interrupted my concerns. I just wanted to make life perfect for her and worried that I wouldn't be able to do so. Something woke her and she looked up at me again and smiled sweetly.
"Why are you still awake?" She smiled again.
"Oh, just thinking about some things," I replied.
"Just go to sleep." She sounded almost frustrated, but there was a hint of humor in her voice.
I smiled at her."How can I sleep when you're distracting me?"She looked confused, then finally spoke up.
"What was I doing?" SHe had genuine concern in her voice. "Did I move around too much? Or snore?" She spoke quickly. I just smiled. "What?...What did I do?" She cracked a smile. "What?" she questioned me again, more seriously this time.
My smile faded away. "Well, you know, just thinking about whatever...you...me...us together...and---" She interrupted me.
"Worrying?" She smiled.
"Yeah, you could say that. I'm worrying....about whether I'm good enough for you....or why you're with me...or whether I'll be able to support you and protect you....or whether I can give you what you really want or need....or whatever....you know." I smiled with embarrassment.
Without saying anything, she ran her hand down my face tenderly and smiled. She paused for a moment before she spoke.
"Ok....well, you know what I think about worrying; but I understand why you do worry and why you have those concerns. But, seriously, we'll cross those bridges when we get there. Don't worry so much about the future. It will come as it is supposed to happen...and why you're wondering why I am with you?---don't worry about that. Just know that I AM with you, ok?....Does that help?" She smiled empathetically.
"Yeah, that really helps actually....Sometimes I can't help it though. I just want things to be perfect for you."
"Yes, and right now they are." She smiled again.
"You're right. Ok."There was a moment of silence. She just looked up at me.
I spoke: "I love you."
"I love you, too."She rolled over and went back to sleep.
Morning is almost here and I have barely gotten any sleep. She was distracting me all night. Not that she meant to keep me awake, she has her ways. It's not like she was tossing and turning or snoring or something like that; in fact, on the contrary: she was sleeping, angelic-like.
----
She slipped under the covers and cuddled close to me, trying to keep warm. She rested her tired head on my shoulder and looked up at me.
"You have dreamy eyes." She smiled. The phrase just seemed to slip off her tongue. The longer she laid by my side, the more relaxed she became. I could feel her muscles loosening as she leaned in hard against my body. I also felt her breathing change as she relaxed and trusted me. Every so often, she would inhale deeply and slowly, and exhale just as deeply and slowly. Her breath, as she exhaled, tickled my neck.
As she lie there, she was completely unaware of her strong influence on me. I felt her weight upon my body. It was like having the weight of the whole world upon my heart.A thousand questions raced through my mind.
"How was I going to support her? What can I do to support her? What kind of support does she need? Am I good enough for her? Why does she trust me so much? What's our future gonna be like? How can I make her happy?"---she adjusted her head slightly, subconsciously, which interrupted my concerns. I just wanted to make life perfect for her and worried that I wouldn't be able to do so. Something woke her and she looked up at me again and smiled sweetly.
"Why are you still awake?" She smiled again.
"Oh, just thinking about some things," I replied.
"Just go to sleep." She sounded almost frustrated, but there was a hint of humor in her voice.
I smiled at her."How can I sleep when you're distracting me?"She looked confused, then finally spoke up.
"What was I doing?" SHe had genuine concern in her voice. "Did I move around too much? Or snore?" She spoke quickly. I just smiled. "What?...What did I do?" She cracked a smile. "What?" she questioned me again, more seriously this time.
My smile faded away. "Well, you know, just thinking about whatever...you...me...us together...and---" She interrupted me.
"Worrying?" She smiled.
"Yeah, you could say that. I'm worrying....about whether I'm good enough for you....or why you're with me...or whether I'll be able to support you and protect you....or whether I can give you what you really want or need....or whatever....you know." I smiled with embarrassment.
Without saying anything, she ran her hand down my face tenderly and smiled. She paused for a moment before she spoke.
"Ok....well, you know what I think about worrying; but I understand why you do worry and why you have those concerns. But, seriously, we'll cross those bridges when we get there. Don't worry so much about the future. It will come as it is supposed to happen...and why you're wondering why I am with you?---don't worry about that. Just know that I AM with you, ok?....Does that help?" She smiled empathetically.
"Yeah, that really helps actually....Sometimes I can't help it though. I just want things to be perfect for you."
"Yes, and right now they are." She smiled again.
"You're right. Ok."There was a moment of silence. She just looked up at me.
I spoke: "I love you."
"I love you, too."She rolled over and went back to sleep.
3.04.2009
Golden Mittens
Golden mittens covered her hands, as a shiny protective coat.
Her hands, shaky, unstable, and boney, can barely support the weight of the golden mittens.
But she must wear the golden mittens because the golden mittens give her life.
The golden mittens ARE her life.
The golden mittens cured her.
The golden mittens gave her happiness.
Although it is painful and sometimes difficult to bear, she must wear the golden mittens.
The golden mittens covered her hands, holding the knife, dripping with his blood.
Her hands, shaky, unstable, and boney, can barely support the weight of the golden mittens.
But she must wear the golden mittens because the golden mittens give her life.
The golden mittens ARE her life.
The golden mittens cured her.
The golden mittens gave her happiness.
Although it is painful and sometimes difficult to bear, she must wear the golden mittens.
The golden mittens covered her hands, holding the knife, dripping with his blood.
Breaking Ice
She freezes down to her bones.
Her heart stops.
Zomby-like she walks on.
And soon enough, she is gone.
When she was there, she was not.
You tried to break her ice, but it was too thick.
You heated things up to try to melt her, but down to her core she is ice.
Shr froze down to her bones.
Her heart stopped.
Zomby-like she walked on.
And soon enough, she was gone.
Her heart stops.
Zomby-like she walks on.
And soon enough, she is gone.
When she was there, she was not.
You tried to break her ice, but it was too thick.
You heated things up to try to melt her, but down to her core she is ice.
Shr froze down to her bones.
Her heart stopped.
Zomby-like she walked on.
And soon enough, she was gone.
3.02.2009
Getting in Trouble
My left hand is in my pocket, merely from keeping it from getting in trouble.
My left leg shakes, merely because my right hand gets in trouble.
My heart races because my hands get in trouble.
What's a girl to do?
My left leg shakes, merely because my right hand gets in trouble.
My heart races because my hands get in trouble.
What's a girl to do?
Th Milk Is Gone
Rush hour traffic on a holiday weekend; and the milk is gone.
No money to pay the bills, no money to buy food; and the milk is gone.
The fridge is packed full of leftovers; but the milk is gone.
The faucet water drips drips drips; but the milk is dried up.
The pain increases and nothing soothes; and the milk is gone.
People leave; and the milk is still gone.
The necessities are depleted, and even becoming nonexistent.
The emotional pain is overwhelming, in abundance, in oversupply.
No one is supporting; indeed not even family and friends.
No one cares that you're losing it; that everything you knew and had is no longer yours.
Because the milk is gone.
No money to pay the bills, no money to buy food; and the milk is gone.
The fridge is packed full of leftovers; but the milk is gone.
The faucet water drips drips drips; but the milk is dried up.
The pain increases and nothing soothes; and the milk is gone.
People leave; and the milk is still gone.
The necessities are depleted, and even becoming nonexistent.
The emotional pain is overwhelming, in abundance, in oversupply.
No one is supporting; indeed not even family and friends.
No one cares that you're losing it; that everything you knew and had is no longer yours.
Because the milk is gone.
3.01.2009
Fog Lights
I only see it through the fog.
Night had fallen a past while ago. The cold had fallen also. I found myself sitting in the back seat of a cramped car, looking out the foggy window. The core of the lights shone brighter than anything else. A ring of dimmer light shone around that core. I only saw it through the foggy windows.
I only saw it through the fog.
I loved the glistening lights and how they were dimmed because of the fog. I seemed to almost see the lights better because of the fog.
It was a romantic look and feeling; that of the lights through the fog.
How much better would life be if we only saw it through the fog?
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